The Cult of Lincoln

Thursday, August 24, 2006

From here:
Effective November 1, 2006, the SCI FI Channel will change their name to SurgeTV, to reflect the changing demographic thrust of the successful long-running cable channel. In addition, deals are currently working out to bring back ECW for a three-times a week run in prime time, as well as reruns (Pre-WWE) of professional wrestling events.

SurgeTV hopes to tap into the newfound audience of science fiction wrestling fans, by promoting cross-over programming, including Eureka's Colin Ferguson's guest appearance in the ECW ring, and Season 2 of Stan Lee's Who Wants To Be A Superhero to include ring matches between competitors. Saucier, racier stories will be aired after the midnight hour, and in a change for the popular channel, may include R-rated material.

While much of the original programming the SCI FI Channel has produced will remain on air through the next year, SurgeTV expects sweeping changes to the network, shifting away from the so-called "nerd" demographic. This means that SurgeTV will try to appeal to it's growing number of "extreme" viewers by removing all of it's current re-run programming and replacing it with a new "brand" - Xtreme Surge At Night. Effective November 1, 2006, SurgeTV will begin broadcasting reruns of Hogan Knows Best and original WWE programming. Filling out the early morning hours will be the ground-breaking American (English language channel) debut of Lucha Libre sporting events.

SurgeTV will continue publishing Sci Fi magazine, which will remain uneffected by the format changes taking place on air.

SurgeTV is a television network where extreme action can be found. SurgeTV fuels the adrenaline of viewers with original series and events, blockbuster movies and classic wrestling programming, as well as a dynamic Web site ( and magazine. Launched in 1992, and currently in 85 million homes, SurgeTV is a network of NBC Universal, one of the world's leading media and entertainment companies.
Away from the "nerd" demographic? But where will we geeks go? We've been cast out like little match girls, without the nerdery we love! Don't they realize that they filled a demographic hole? There are enough channels dedicated to wrestling. We don't need one more! Now I get why they're making Harry Dresden a hockey fan. *glowers*

And no "re-run" programming? I couldn't care less if they stopped airing Firefly reruns, but what about shows like Doctor Who, for which Sci-Fi provides the first run for fans in the US? If they discontinue this practice, there will be words exchanged. And in typical Mal-style, certain bullets.

Also? Your new name would be more befitting a gay porn channel. Just saying.

Edit: Aaaaaand it was a hoax! We nerds can breathe a collective sigh of relief. :D

Priscilla said at 10:13 AM


i do hope the part about a second season of who wants to be a superhero? is true, though!
Oh man, I was hoping. Because that is just WRONG.

I need my fix of b grade horror and scifi films.
as i was reading, i was like, "this is such crap. no way is this true!" but, dumber things have happened. :)
holy shit! i was about to have a coronary. thanks for making my heart reconsider arrythmia.
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Title cartoon by Bruce Eric Kaplan, used without permission.

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