Why would I lie to you when the truth is so much more damaging?

I don't want your attitude. I've got one of my own.

I'm sorry, I didn't know cones mated.

640 Kilobytes of computer memory ought to be enough for anybody.

Scientists are explorers. Philosophers are tourists.

I'm going to be myself. If anyone has a problem with that, it's their problem.

I think Superman needs some pink glitter.

We'll see if the JETS budget has enough money for a psychoanalysis.

Make like an ion and speculate!

Voltaic cell power! Copper nitrate in a half-cell!

People have used food before. They're not going to have anything against bagels wrapped in duct tape.

Where did that extra hydrogen atom go to?" "I don't know Caroline, I think it went to Disneyworld.

Is that a happy molecule?

Why aren't there any bobs or steves, why are all the atoms named adam?

There is nothing that strikes more fear in a nuclear utility executive's heart than a well-prepared grandmother.

There are more exceptions than there are rules.

According to doomsayers, the alignment will cause earthquakes, floods, and maybe even split our planet in two like a meat cleaver through a head of lettuce! In all fairness that sounds like an event to note on your calendar.

Here's the short version: "Armageddon" got some astronomy right. For example, there is an asteroid in the movie, and asteroids do indeed exist. And then there was... um... well, you know... um. Okay, so that was about all they got right.

Oh, that was mean! But I would have done the same thing.

If it's logical, we can't do it.

Success is 90% inspiration, 9% perspiration, and 1% duct tape.

At first I didn't think that was possible. Then I met you.

Are we allowed to kick people out of JETS because we think they're scary?

We forever left our mark on this school and it's not a good mark.

Can I be your padowan?

Nothing personal, we just despise you in a businesslike fashion.

Wow! Imagine how many babies could be strangled by this thing! I tend to measure plastic in the amount of babies that could be strangled, and there was this huge piece of plastic...

Note: Registration fees are non-refundable unless the competition is cancelled due to inclement weather or other acts of god.

I hate passion with a passion.

Boy, someone sure did a number on that carbon atom!

We are helping! You're just rejecting our brilliance!

Star Wars is always a priority.

Laura: You know that reference book you have? Will all the nifty stuff?
Amy: Yeah! It's like having a nerd in your pocket!

And now, the agnostic Chamber of Commerce members shall present "Fishkill: An interpretive dance"!

Me: I would kill him. I would really kill him.
Mackenzie: First I would die, then I would kill him.

The sun is a government conspiracy. It died many years ago, so they blow up nuclear warheads constantly to create 'ultra-violet' radiation and to keep the public under control.

They're after me, because I know the truth.

JETS is a cult.

Vertigo is a government conspiracy. It's to keep us from jumping off buildings and discovering the truth.

The 'lunar landing' is a government conspiracy. 'NASA' actually used the funds to build a death star, and then created star wars to keep the people who know the truth from sounding remotely sane.

This one received the coveted "worst distortion of science award" from some folks who apparently believe plutonium and NASA go together like gin & tonic...whoops! spilled the glass...oh well, we'll clean it up in 240,000 years...

If you've ever visited a nuclear power plant, you may have come across a surprising array of wildlife enjoying the pristine environment - perhaps a red-cockaded woodpecker, or a family of pheasants, or a bald eagle gliding across the sky.

Nature's creatures thrive on unpolluted air and water. And that's exactly what they find near nuclear power plants.

Unlike power plants that burn fossil fuels, nuclear power plants don't burn anything. They split uranium atoms instead.

A nuclear reactor engine that would provide the right amount of energy for a car could be built and would run fine and would require refuelling only every 5 or 10 years. The only problem is that it would kill driver, the passengers, and perhaps bystanders.

If at first you don't succeed, look in the trash for the instructions.

If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.

Cut to fit; beat into place.

I enjoyed the football game last night--especially the cheerleaders.